Thursday, December 24, 2009

Christmas Letter to Santa (if he exists)

Dear Santa,

Hi Santa! This is me, Jenny, from you know where. I can't really put all my info on here, 'cause I'd probably be stalked and/or raped/creeped out by those sick people out in this world who SURELY don't deserve anything for Christmas. (LOL, jk. but seriously.)

Anyways, as you should know, I have lived my thirteen years of life so far without ever hearing or receiving anything from you, and I'd like to know why. You could've given me like..a little message or something. That would've fueled my belief in you...since it's like dead right now.

Ooh! And before I start my list and ranting, sorry about last year if you actually exist, 'cause I couldn't find any cookies so I just gave you cheesitz...sorry if you have anything against cheese. I thought you wouldn't be lactose intolerant or anything, since you drink milk, but maybe cheese makes you gassy or something. Therefore, your ride around the world would be a little bumpy. So sorry if anything bad happened, and if that prevented you from giving me your message.

Also, sorry last year about preventing my sister from putting out "reindeer food" on our front lawn. I felt so sorry for her because I'm absolutely positive that your reindeer don't eat glitter and beads...so...yeah. And I didn't want our whole front lawn to be all shiny and get all messy later after Christmas..so forgive me for that, too.

Ok. Now I'll get down to business.

Anyways, as you know my list changes over the years, so I'll give you a new one for this year..hopefully one day in advance would work. (If you actually are real.)

1. private stuff that i'm not putting on here, but you of all people should know.
2. camera!
3. iPod!!
4. those technology-savvy skills that everyone seems to have except for me. possibly a handbook that's not too boring to read?
5. for friends to see that i'm not always silly and un-serious, and trust me.
6. parents to trust me too, and stop yelling at me. It gets pretty annoying. Maybe like...some kinda calmy downy thingy for them?
7. DESK. FOR MY ROOM.
8. physical stuff. (like my braces. they hurt. and..other stuff.)
9. to not get in any arguments with friends that'll hurt both of us. I don't wanna turn into those drama queen people that everyone hates. :)
10. LOOVE! <3
11. More viewers for my blog? lol.
12. SOLO IN DANCE! WHICH I WON'T MESS UP ON!!
13. stay first chair? at least for the concerts.
14. ok, and if you won't gimme any of this other stuff, just coal. please? at least a note? or something. as you can see, i obviously have no life, so just..bear with me.

Ok, in conclusion, thanks for reading this, if you have internet or whatever. Please somehow tell me you survive, and not in some corny way like, "I'm alive in children's hearts." NO. THAT'S JUST A LOAD OF CRAP. NO ONE IN REAL LIFE AND CIVILIZATION TALKS LIKE THAT AND MEANS IT.

Anyways, thanks for taking time out of this busy day for me. :) If you read this. Merry Christmas to you!!

~Jenny

P.S. PLEASE PLEASE IF YOU CAN'T GIMME ANYTHING 'CAUSE I'VE BEEN TOO BAD, JUST GIMME COAL. AT LEAST I CAN SELL THAT FOR MONEY, AND STILL KINDA BE HAPPY. AND I'LL KNOW YOU EXIST! ;D

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